Pajama party

I'm pretty sure I shouldn't be panicking about pajamas. Panicking in the least crazy way possible, of course.

I've been sort of ambivalent about The Boy's arrival, and I haven't been able to figure out why. I should be so excited, but mostly, I have been annoyed about my pajamas. I have to wear cute pajamas while he's here, don't I? Don't I? Well, I don't want to. I don't.

But I don't have a choice.

So I will wear cute pajamas and, also, I will stop being logical. Because right now, logic is causing me to think about how vulnerable I feel. He will be in my space, in my single girl space, for an entire week. He's going to see everything. And honestly, it's scaring me. I don't want to be vulnerable. I'm just fine being closed off and distant and unavailable. I'm fine sleeping alone and staying up late working. I'm fine with "nothing special" and sleeping in former loves' t-shirts without judgment. Thankyouverymuch.