The in between

We're very happy together.

It's almost worrisome, how well I'm adjusting to relationship life. Being such good friends first makes it easier and more difficult in some ways. Easier because it feels like I'm making an informed decision about who I'm dating, I don't have to get used to annoying quirks or find out things I may consider deal-breakers down the line. It's helpful, the friends-first thing.

However. The friends-first thing is cumbersome because for a while I seriously didn't think we would ever date, and thus dated (or just good old fashioned kissed) several of his friends. And he met many guys I previously dated. All because I didn't think we were going to become a couple. I thought we didn't have a chance.

But that may be the beauty of it. I didn't think it was possible. And it's not convenient because we're both living in Chicago now. That's what we told ourselves: that it was too convenient to be together. But the thing is, I got to choose him. We all know I have no trouble scrounging up men to date. Good guys, even. I may be a serial dater, but I tend to date good men. So there were good men in the picture, and still, it was: him.

(And don't tell him, but I think creepy nice things about him all the time. Longevity things. Years from now things. I don't believe in marriage as a formula for love, or love as a formula for marriage, but I believe in being with him for some time.)

I'm young. I'm in love. I can't be trusted.