Trophy wife

First dates, you can't do anything with them.

This is because (and we all know this is true) you mostly end up getting drunk because you're nervous and one more gin and tonic? Sure, he's buying. and then you say gin and tonic-inspired things and then no one really knows anything about the other. Because gin and tonic-inspired things? That's called drunk.

And then finally, finally, on date five, when you're getting down to actually knowing the person, you're already so involved that you can't disentangle yourself from this mess. Because you know what you realize on date five? You'd rather be at home watching reruns of Friends in your pajamas. But you've already invested so much time.

This is why people get married.