Back up

Listening to Ryan Adams these days and jotting down my line up, lining up the men, moving on and weaving a tangled web. Spending my morning talking to The Bartender and caring about him, wanting to sit next to him, to hold his hand, to kiss him and not have to pretend for a moment that it's not exactly what I want. Spending every moment with (oh, pseudonym, don't fail me now!) Mr. Right, Mr. Exactly Right. Mr. Does Everything Right and Loves Me and Wants the Best for Me and Cooks for Me and Rides the Bus with Me and Holds My Hand. Except this scenario takes convincing for me. I don't really want this scenario. And then there is Someone New. There have been dates and it's beginning to feel the same, the line up, the back burner.