The moment I say I am willingly not dating anyone right now and happy with it of course, of course, I spend my day brooding and acting like the world owes me a favor. Why can't I sit with myself for one damn minute, just sit and not stew, not wonder, not check my phone to make sure it's still working because why hasn't anyone called?
I need to learn to sit with myself.
I can't do what I used to do, chase Men Who Are Wrong just for the fun of it, get involved with Men Who Are Wrong for the thrill of it, get crushed by Men Who Are Wrong. I can't keep going in these circles, keep acting like the world has wronged me when I am the one who keeps making poor choices. But two days of sitting with myself and I might lose my mind. I compulsively check my phone to make sure the damn thing is working, let my mind wander and come back and realize my life is the same, I'm not getting swept up but I'm also making positive changes every second that I'm not chasing Men Who Are Wrong.
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