Men are from?

Sacrifices. What are we willing to sacrifice all in the name of a relationship? Of a partner?

Money? Sex? Love? With The Ex, I sacrificed words. I sacrificed feelings, ideas; and really, in the end, it was love. He never could love me. And I didn't know why. I tried so hard to make myself lovable, I put up with bullshit for a long, long time, all in the name of love. And then I acted out. He's not going to love me then? Well fine, I'll meet someone else. I'll date someone else. I'll kiss someone else.

But that didn't work. Because the man who I really wanted, he didn't notice. He didn't care. He didn't love me. Even when I spelled it out for him, even when I said: I can't do this because you are never going to love me.

What are you willing to sacrifice for a relationship? There's a give and take in all relationships, and everyone is different. Some people stay for reasons they shouldn't: the sex is too good to leave, or even something as trivial as having a date to a wedding in a couple weeks (just hold on a little while longer! I can't go alone!). I actually didn't want to leave a man once because he loved bookstores and coffee as much as me; I thought that was a reason to stay, even for a bit longer. I didn't want to leave another man because I didn't know how to sleep alone. (And here I am today, sleeping alone, alive and very, very well.) I think it's important to know our limits. To know that relationships are compromise, but also to know the difference between compromise and defeat. In not being loved. In not getting what you need.

Because truthfully? You're in this for you.