Late bloomer

I can't even make this stuff up. I am a twenty-six-year-old woman. I have had this blog for three years and my ramblings often feel ridiculous even to me, so it's a miracle if anyone out there is actually reading.

But. If you have been reading these three years, I have now come across not just one but now, another virgin.

Grown men who have never slept with a woman, for this reason or that.

But wait wait wait a minute. This latest one is a bartender at a high end restaurant, has lived all over the country, is well dressed, mild mannered, is in his thirties and stable. And has never had sex?

I thought it was a joke. We were sort of in the heat of the moment and he mumbled something to the effect of, I've never had sex, and I pulled back, sat up, stopped. Asked if he was joking because it was just not a good time for that kind of joke. Then of course offended him because no, he just wasn't joking.

How is this possible? How does one tactfully ask this?

What I gleaned is that until recently, he's had the idea of waiting until marriage. In his dating life, he dated but never consummated. Until recently, recently-ish when he stopped seeing someone and got to thinking. Got to thinking that maybe it was time to stop waiting around.

I don't really want to take a thirty-five-year-old man's V card. I don't.

Who the hell does?

I didn't know how to get the hell outta there fast enough. Until. Until we went back to talking, to kissing to talking, to talking to kissing, to laughing, laughing loudly about things that probably aren't funny to anyone else but us, making him kiss my neck and him telling me a long story about meeting his hero, his writing hero, me looking right into his eyes and understanding him. He speaks my language. He gets it. He gets me.

But he's a virgin. And now what? Now what if I lose interest immediately, what if I sleep with this man and then am over it? Worse, what if I take his virginity and then he hurries off to other uncharted territory now that the initial deed is done? Off to sow his oats and the like.

I really like this guy. I'm still a little confused. I'm still a lot confused. It's all a puzzle. But I like him. This is the part where I'm supposed to recognize the red flags despite my giddy feelings, right?